This utterly silly post is a collaborative effort between myself and of one of my favorite families. There may have been a bit of alcohol involved as well. Thanks to Jana, Tom and Tristen for an amazing three weeks!

It started in the city they call Panama
When looking at hotels and dreaming of swans
Made of white towels on linens so fine
In $300 hotel rooms that were way out of line

We settled on a hostel instead
With not quite so soft of a bed

We continued our journey north to the clouds
To a giant old crater away from the crowds

(This is El Valle, the town is built in the crater of an old volcano. At first it was a lake, but then the earth shifted and the water flowed out, and now it’s a gorgeous valley.)

We climbed a volcano then had to get cool
So under a waterfall we swam in a pool

There we befriended Flacito, a little black dog
Who followed us home as rain poured through fog



On to Catalina where we all got the runs
Drinking mojitos and having lots of fun

On the island of Cebaco we snorkeled all day
Watching the fish and octopi play
Our hosts captured lobsters as red as our backs
Swiftly we headed back to our shack

In the cabana, tired and beat
Red from the sun and exhausted by heat
A pack was lifted and under we found
A giant scorpion Jana squished to the ground

Tom jumped on the bed, the sheets in a whirl
While Stephanie screamed like a scared little girl
We didn’t check, but we are pretty sure
Marks may have been skidded in our under drawers

Back to the mountains a bus whisked us away
To the idyllic little town known as Boquete





Hiking in the forest was the goal one day
But a lack of road signs got in the way
So instead we headed to a Peruvian restaurant
And drank…
After a night of Pisco we were all very tired
We toured a coffee farm to get ourselves wired

Little did we know Tristen was imbibing
At 16 years old, coffee had him flying
Back to the hostel with no sleep in sight
He created a website that bought us free nights
At first we were concerned but then saw the light
A teenage tech geek on caffeine was alright

With money in our pockets we headed to the sea
Dreaming of tropical property


At a very cheap price the place sounded appealing
But the heat and the bugs had us all reeling
Dolphins and pineapples tried to persuade


But peace with the heat could not be made
Sleepless nights left Stephanie grumpy
Let’s just face it she was looking kind of dumpy
Covered in bug bites and feeling pretty grim
It was back to the mountains to try and save her skin
To the mainland we sped in a dugout canoe
Past dilapidated dwellings and garbage a strewn

With a ticket for going the wrong way down a street
We left Almirante in defiant retreat

A couple wrong turns and some hairpin curves
Had us a bit nauseous and frazzled our nerves
Around a bend the road ended without warning
Tom hit the brakes and the tires were burning
We came to a stop only to find
Skid marks a plenty, on the road left behind

At that moment we entered the twilight zone
Down a road we had already roamed
Confusion set in, panic almost attacked
When we realized our destination was now at our backs

At this point we decided Costa Rica was too much
We couldn’t imagine dealing with a bus
Tired and thirsty we returned to the hills
And were sadly informed our little hostel was filled

The owner told us he had a hotel
He’d give the same rate, it was just up the hill
So off we went and were thrilled when we found…


Elephants, swans and flowers made of towels!